recalling a buddha

greg just posted an extended trailer for the documentary he’s editing, about the 16th karmapa. i never met karmapa, but i’ve seen him on video from the 1970’s and it was impressive. his mind definitely was different, something distinctly different about the way he would relate and interact.

perhaps he was a modern day buddha. as are possibly many people in this documentary! besides those named with subtitles, i also recognized trungpa rinpoche, khandro rinpoche, dzongsar khyentse rinpoche, and ponlop rinpoche; all have had claims that they are enlightened, all identified as small children as reincarnations of previously revered teachers and trained from youth.

i was lucky and attended one of greg’s interviews with dzongsar khyentse, during rinpoche’s teaching on madhyamaka a year ago. it’s crazy just being in the room with these teachers. what khandro rinpoche describes, your hair standing on end and you leaving completely shaky after just three to five minutes, is just touching on it. there’s something non-conceptual going on, something i can’t really describe. and it’s not just one teacher in particular, there’s something that meditation does to people after awhile where they radiate into the whole room. and it’s not all love and light, it’s incredibly unnerving. like you’re totally naked. and there’s nowhere to hide whatsoever. but so powerful, just being there shows you so much about your thought patterns and your agenda and your personal trips. so there’s compassion in the radiation, but it’s not particularly sweet compassion. very scary sometimes.

perhaps this post makes me sound like some 1970’s guru worshiping devotee, with flowers and scented water. that’s definitely not me. i’m the last person to follow around a guru and donate all my money so they can have another freakin rolls royce. but i have to confess there is something very unusual about the experience of being with these teachers. and it’s not about them particularly. i’ll attempt an explanation. it’s like we’re used to getting some sort of feedback from our gestures, our emotions, from what’s on our mind. most people play along and relate, whether they agree or disagree with our story line. but being with these people you get nothing back, complete space. it’s not what we expect, and suddenly our normal patterns are pointed out to us in the midst of that unusual space. all they do is see what our trip is, and in doing so we find ourself being forced to look at it as if in a mirror. so it’s our trip, but then who wants to look at their own selfish trip like that. it sucks. but it can be very helpful.

i just received this quote from sogyal rinpoche, from his daily quote email. it’s really what i was referring to:

Sometimes when we see too much truth about ourselves suddenly mirrored in front of us by the teacher or the teachings, it is simply too difficult to face, too terrifying to recognize, too painful to accept as the reality about ourselves. We deny and reject it, in an absurd and desperate attempt to defend ourselves from ourselves, from the truth of who we really are. And when there are things too powerful or too difficult to accept about ourselves, we project them onto the world around us, usually onto those who help us and love us the most - our teacher, the teachings, our parent, or our closest friend.

How can we possibly penetrate the tough shield of this defensive system? The very best solution is when we can recognize ourselves that we are living duped by our own delusions. I have seen how for many people a glimpse of the truth, the true View, can bring the whole fantastic construction of wrong views, fabricated by ignorance, tumbling instantly to the ground.

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